January 2004

"Mary kept all these things, pondering them in her heart," Luke tells us in his second chapter, verse 19. She kept what things in her heart? Everything that had occurred, all that had been said and done, she pondered them in her heart. She thought about them. She thought about them and responded to them. She listened to God, to what had been done and said to her and pondered them in her heart. She pondered the miracles, great and small. Mary is setting an example for us, not only in being obedient, but also in showing us how to examine our lives.

The beginning of a new year is an auspicious time to begin that process, but not the only time. In fact our cities and our nation does a similar thing with the State of the City and the State of the Nation speeches. Although the intent is somewhat different, it is, none the less an examination of the past year and a hope for the next new year. Sometimes people make New Year's Resolutions. They often fail and the State of the City-Union often is just rhetoric because what is missing is the pondering in the heart that Mary demonstrates for us.

Any time we begin anew, whether it is a new year or after a good confession, we need to ponder the past to examine what in that past has influenced us to good or ill. If we are not aware of circumstances, the process we use to make choices, and the decisions we take, then how can we hope to make changes in our lives? If we are not aware of obstacles how can we avoid them? If we do not pay attention to God's miracles, how can we grow intellectually, emotionally and especially spiritually?

You see, God calls us to grow in holiness. He calls us to be holy as He is holy and only by pondering what is happening can we hope to take that step with awareness towards Him. Many things happened last year to us as a people of Christ, as a nation of Americans, in our small communities, in our jobs, in our families, in our prayer lives. What has impacted you? It has been said that an unexamined life is not worth living. How do you examine your life? What are you pondering in your heart? What has been life giving or nurturing to you? What has been gift in this year for you?

Last year as a Church, we experienced the devastating and horrendous result of the actions of some clergy. This has impacted many quite negatively. Lives have been destroyed. The media has pounced on each crumb of news, some to expose, some to destroy, some to inform. How has the sex scandal in the Church affected you? Have you pondered in your heart what we as a Church or you as an individual Christian are to learn from this tragedy? What are you doing in your own life to support your Priest's who are noble and holy? What are you doing to live your faith? What, in all this mess, has been life giving? The new openness, the forthright attitude of most of our Bishops give me hope for the Church. Is this God's way of bringing new life to our faith? Maybe each of us needs to be more active, more open, more aware so that growth in holiness is the case. This could be miraculous, a gift.

Our nation experienced terrorism and a war, both of which are still impacting us. My daughter is a flight attendant and so the airline news always plays an important part of my media attention. The terrorism level keeps aware that there is a threat to our well being and our American way of life is in jeopardy. What can be the miracle here? Perhaps, the most impressive part of the state of the world is to be aware that there is something more powerful than the evil that prevails in this world. Scripture says that in this world we will have tribulation, but that Jesus has overcome the world. The nurturing, life giving gift in this time of terror and tragedy seems to be an understanding that we were bought at a price, the battle is finished, but we must live in a broken land until He comes to claim us. We are Christians and we are over comers of this world even in the midst of the battle, even in the midst of the storm. The miracles, great and small, abound in His protection, His love, His mercy, in His gift of life and in the security of life after death.

In Southern California there were terrible wildfires in the month of October, 2003. More than 2,000 homes were burned down. Some people got out with only the clothes on their backs; some did not get out at all. Many were evacuated one or more times. One family lost their home, their belongings, everything. The little boy in the family had only his pajamas on when they had to flee the flames. Ten days later they had to put the little boy's dog to sleep. The dog had suffered from smoke inhalation. They lost everything except each other. How grateful they are to have each other. Things, they found, were not important. That was the hue and cry from so many. Even as I had to evacuate my home, which was not destroyed, the thought was things are not important. Things are nice and make one comfortable, but the love and care that our community showed, gave hope that we are all really one family, one body in Christ. This is truly a miracle.

There are so many stories to tell about this fire. Here is one that is special. One child described her home as it burned down. She told of going to sift the ashes after the flames had cooled and of looking for anything recognizable. The family found a few pieces of tile from the kitchen. Her bedroom was all ash except for a piece of a jewelry box that was mostly melted. Under the remains of the melted box was a paper picture that did not burn. The picture was of Jesus. This is her prized possession now. Everything else was destroyed, but Jesus was whole and in tact on a paper picture that was in the midst of the fiery furnace of the California Wildfires. What a wonderful gift for this child. How it touched me, this small miracle. A thing to be pondered in the heart.

My friend lost his mother. Another friend lost his grandchild to an freak horseback riding accident. After a heartbreaking divorce, another friend found love again. A new business venture became real. Our Parish started the Stephen Ministry. People were reunited. New opportunities appeared. We shared old stories and new hopes with many friends. The talk we had, the prayer you requested, the poetry that touched my heart, the scripture passage that repeats in my mind, the dream that stays in my wakefulness, the coincidence that seemed so profound, an old friend that appeared, these are some of the unforgettable moments my heart ponders. Oh, so many unexpected turns of events. The coming to be and the passing away of life's incidents were many. In each, there is a miracle, great or small. In each there is a lesson to ponder in one's heart. This new year is a time to ponder the past; plant for the future; rest in the knowledge that God has everything under control. He is the maker of miracles, great and small, from which I am to learn, to grow and to become a little more holy with each passing year.


Patricia G. Medeiros, MS, MFT